Watching a loved one go through a traumatic experience is always hard. You are there to hold them through the difficulties they face in those initial days, wondering when life is going to start to feel somewhat normal again. However, what you don't expect is the possible permanent changes in your friend's demeanor or the way your partner cannot withstand any physical affection.
There is a space where you can feel isolated as a loved one with someone who has experienced trauma. It can feel exhausting and even somewhat shameful to feel any negative emotion toward your partner and their experiences. However, all of this is far more common than we would ever like to admit.
I specialize in providing support to those who are providing support. I think that it is important if you have someone who has experienced a heavy traumatic experience that you are always keenly aware of your own self-care and well being.
It is not selfish to do self-care; it is essential. You cannot pour from an empty cup.